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Getting Fixed

A Tennessee couple — Dave and Rebecca Kosmitis both bona fide rednecks, had 9 children.

They went to the doctor to see about getting Dave “fixed.” The doctor gladly started the required procedure and asked them what finally made them make the decision. Why, after 9 children, would they choose to do this?

Dave replied that they had read in a recent article that 1 out of every 10 children being born in the United States was Mexican, and they didn’t want to take a chance on having a Mexican baby, because neither of them could speak Spanish.
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Historical Wife

A man complains to a friend, "I can't take it anymore." "What's wrong?" his concerned friend asks. "It's my wife. Every time we have an argument, she gets historical!" "You mean hysterical," his friend said, chuckling. "No, I mean HISTORICAL," the man insists. "Every argument we have, she'll go "I still remember that time when you ...."
 
   
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