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Learn how to converse with your wifes

You are taking your life in your own hands when you open your mouth after your wife has had a bad day

DANGEROUS: What’s for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?


DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: Wow! Look at you!


DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here’s fifty dollars.


DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?


DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn’t overdo today.
SAFEST: I’ve always loved you in that robe.
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Learn to use right tools for the job


An old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he called his grandson to his bed Grandson I wanta you to listen to me. I wanta you to take mya 45 automatic pistol, so you will always remember me.

But grandpa I really don't like guns, how about you leaving me your Rolex watch instead.

You lisina to me, some day you goin a be runna da bussiness, you goina have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a biga home and maybe a couple od bambino, some day you goina come hom and maybe finda you wife in be with another man. Whata you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, "TIMES UP"?
 
   
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